Archive for October, 2010

October 27, 2010

Why You and I Need 10,000 Hours

I like Wednesdays. They’re right smack dab in the middle of things. You’ve got a few days under your belt and you’ve got just a few more to go. I especially like Wednesdays at the end of the month because I feel like I get to really review the month, start shutting it down, and start prepping for the next one. So, I figure that I should review those goals I’d posted a while ago.

MutantSupermodel Life Goals as of October 27, 2010:

  1. Try the money envelope system September 30, 2010 for three months (December 31, 2010).  I’ve decided to cancel this. I’ve pretty much come up with the equivalent of a money system on Excel and so far this month, it’s actually working. I may have jinxed myself, and I know this, but I feel pretty good about the coming days. 
  2. Create a Christmas budget by October 15, 2010 and stick to it. Must include supplies for gifts to be made which means projects must be decided on. Going to change this to November 12. I have been so busy that I haven’t had a chance to really crack these numbers plus I have a big event next week so I really won’t be able to sit and do this until that passes.
  3. Update the blog at least once a week for the next four weeks (October 22, 2010).  I did it! Yay success!
  4. Complete requested crocheted baby cape by October 27, 2010. Another one that’s going to have to get rescheduled. I think maybe I’ll aim for December 27. I haven’t had much time to work on much crochet projects.
  5. Prepare for a garage sale in late November/early December 2010. Forget it. It’s just not worth it to me right now. Donations will go into effect instead. I’ll schedule a pick up for December 1, 2010.
  6. Commit to another reading project for 2011 and have details worked out by December 15, 2010.
  7. Send Christmas cards Friday, December 17, 2010. I have to figure out what I’m going to do about the photo this year.
  8. Complete MutantEldest’s Mario Bros. blanket by December 25, 2010. I’m pretty sure the deadline will change. I just need to get Christmas done with so I can plan the next batch of projects and include this one.  
  9. Continue tracking spending in Excel for the next four months (January 31, 2011). This is really starting to flow so nicely. My sheet is awesome and I’ve enahanced it to allow me to budget as I would with envelopes. I am loving it.
  10. Go on a family trip in the next six months (March 2011) and a kid-free trip in the six months after that (October 2011). I’m re-invigorated to make this a priority after reading this post from J.D. Roth.  “First, if you’re interested in travel, travel now. Don’t put it off. If travel is a priority, find ways to budget and save to make it happen. Over and over, Kris and I talked with older couples who wished they had started traveling earlier, when they were still more physically active. And when we met travelers our age, they all said the same thing: They consciously choose to sacrifice other luxuries and comforts so that they can travel while they’re young.”
  11. Re-commit to doing laundry every other day for the next six months (March 25, 2011). Still struggling here. And I think I’ve gotten worse the past week with things at work getting very hectic and requiring me to stay late and be a comlpete zombie the time I’m home.
  12. Continue planning Girls’ Night for next six months (April 2011). I have to see if the girls want to get together at the hotel I’ll be at next week.
  13. Lose 12 pounds in 12 months (September 25, 2011). I’m actively trying to eat better especially when I have time. There’s no way I’ll be able to join the program at work but I am still determined to do something. I just noticed I don’t have a scale anymore.
  14. Pay off credit cards by December 2011, one month ahead of schedule.

It’s been over a month since I posted my original goals. I have become keenly aware of how quickly things escape our minds and memory, even goals we “commit” to. I was pretty alarmed to see it’d been over two weeks since I last visited my goals. That’s just too long. It seems the more frequently I visit the goals, the easier it is to keep them in my mind and to draw on them for inspiration when life gets into the lemon bin at the produce section. How do I know I’m not reviewing them often enough? Because it’s been over a month since I came up with them and if you asked me to recite them, I wouldn’t be able to– not even half.

Like lots of things, this gets my mind absolutely whirring. For example, the times I have been really truly successful with my spending have been when I have religiously and meticulously tracked it. This means revisiting my spending not once a week or once a month but at least every couple of days if not every single day. This falls perfectly in line with one of Gretchen Rubin’s keys to keeping resolutions which is to do it every day. I’m even reminded of FLYlady who insists you do the things on her program every day. And then it’s all summed up perfectly by this Radiolab podcast I just listened to last week called “Secrets of Success”. Specifically, Malcolm Gladwell postulates that it takes about 10,000 hours to truly master something.

Do you know how many hours 10,000 is? Well, to start with you only have 8,760 hours in one year so if you’re trying to master something in just one year, you can forget it. Want to master it in only two years? Well you’d better be prepared to dedicate almost 14 hours a day, every day, for two years. According to Gladwell, you’re realistically looking at taking about 10 years to get those 10,000 hours in. Even that’s pretty heavy duty for a normal person– you’re talking dedicating almost three hours a day, every single day for ten years, to something. Now isn’t that sort of a relief?

Really,  just take a minute and think about that. Think about all of those things you beat yourself up for on a constant basis. How many hours do you dedicate to that on a daily basis? How long have you been doing so? Of course, motherhood comes to mind, right? I constantly doubt my mothering skills. I haven’t spent every hour of every day since MutantEldest was born, mothering. I know there are certain people out there that would love to argue otherwise but get real. I’m not mothering every minute of every hour of every day. I don’t dream about mothering every night. Not to mention, when you talk about motherhood, you have to acknowledge the playing field literally changes on an annual basis. Can you really ever truly attain mastery status? What about money? I feel like I’ve been working on my finances for a few years . But every day? A few hours every day? No way. So, it really shouldn’t be a big surprise that I haven’t mastered motherhood or finances just like Gretchen Rubin hasn’t mastered happiness and J.D. Roth hasn’t mastered money. Yes, they are very knowledgeable on their respective topics and years ahead of where I am but masters? I don’t think either would make that claim as they both report having stumbling blocks.

As a matter of fact, the only thing I can pretty confidently say I have dedicated more than 10,000 hours to in my thirtyish years of life is reading. And yes, I do think I’m a master of reading. I devour books whole in very short periods of time. People are often amazed at my ability. They claim I must have a special gift. I don’t. I’m just obsessed with reading. And I’ve been obsessed with reading since I was a small child. You bet I dedicated hours to reading. I read while I walked. I read while I bathed. I read while I ate (or ignored my food more accurately). I read in the car until I got nauseated. I read in bed. I read while I waited. I read between classes. I read every chance I got. So, yes I’m definitely a Master Reader. And the only difference between me and you is a few thousand hours with books.

I really like this theory. In an age where everything is an overnight success, an instant gratification, or an immediate response, we need more reminders to focus on the long-term too. It’s not lost on me that so many hobbies that take an investment of time have been increasingly replaced with activities that don’t require much time from you. But, as in most things, you get what you pay for. Watching television, posting silly videos on YouTube, clicking through Facebook, reading and sending 140 character tweets– they are all effective to a degree  but they also deliver a more shallow level of satisfaction.  

This really invigorates me to contemplate more long-term goals especially as my list is void of anything beyond December 2011– a mere 14 months away. I defnitely don’t have anything 10,000 hours away on there do I? What about you? What would you do with 10,000 hours?

October 20, 2010

Mother Meets Monster

It should be a WIP Wednesday update to share with you all. I do have some vague awareness of the calendar despite vigorous attempts otherwise. But, I haven’t had much time to photograph my progress on any projects and the past couple of days I haven’t even done much crocheting.

Instead, Monday and Tuesday were spent dealing with this one.

You see, in the middle of my Monday I got a call from MutantBaby’s daycare informing me he was running a fever of 102. I needed to pick him up immediately. Furthermore, the school had an outbreak of strep throat so I would not be allowed to return him to their care until he got the clean bill of health. And then begins the saga.

With my new job comes new health insurance which handily kicked in the first of this month (hooray). With new health insurance, for the first time ever, comes new doctors. This is actually not a bad thing because I really wasn’t pleased with the pediatricians my kids were with but we’d been with them since MutantEldest was born and so I was relucant to change. Money talks, doctors change. So, I come home with feverish MutantBaby on Monday and call the new pediatricians office and was told to call during regular hours (lunch time). And called back.  And left a message. And waited. And called back. And got the machine again. And called back. And left another message. And was not amused. Someone suggested Urgent Care. But my new insurance plan requires my paying a deductible for Urgent Care. Not interested thank you so much.

Tuesday morning comes and with it some interesting bits of information. It turns out the daycare did not give MutantBaby medicine to reduce the fever (duh) but by the time he was at my house, he was down to 99 degrees. After he woke up from his nap, he was down to the normal 97. The fever never came back. And Tuesday morning began with the really rambunctious Mutant pictured above. Eager to get this over with, I sent the other two to school and brought MutantBaby with me on the train to my office which is next door to the doctor (convenient!).

MutantBaby loved the train. It was so much fun! We went to the doctor’s office and I informed them of my predicament. The very nice lady informed me she was so sorry but they have a strict anti walk-in policy unless a child is very ill and especially as I was a) new and b) clearly not with a seemingly sick child there was not much she could do. I pleaded my case. I told the tale of the many calls. She went to the back where I assume the Nurse of Oz hangs out and announced I could return at 1:15. Oh joy!

I was so proud. I took my little Mutant right next door to my office and showed him off. And then when I was getting ready to bring him to my office which I work in alone, which has soundproof walls and a door which I always close, two very alarmed co-workers stopped me. They informed me there is a very strict policy where employees cannot have their children in the office. But they knew how completely bombarded I’ve been at work with my impending deadline. So we smuggled him in. Things were going well for about an hour. And then MutantBaby pooped. And I was reminded of how miserable I am at being Prepared Mother. Because I had NOTHING on me. Not a wipe. Not a diaper. Not a thing. So I left. MutantBaby and I went back on the train (yay for him), went to McDonalds (yay for him again), went home, changed, ate junk, and went back to the train (yay him one more time). We got to the doctor’s office just before they re-opened. I took him to the water fountains to play and he was so awesomely disobedient I resisted the urge to throw him into one.

But, the time came and we went back to the doctor’s office where he charmed over the entire staff and waiting room by chanting “Hi Lady!” over and over again at the very nice assitant working the counter. In the exam room, he got naked for his weigh-in (27 pounds, 10 ounces) and refused to be dressed again. We compromised and agreed to underwear plus pull-up. We went to the other room for the doctor and he drove me bonkers. While I distracted him with a notebook and pen (best inventions ever in the realm of childcare) I somehow dressed him. When the notebook got old, I drew on the paper thingy on the bed. And the doctor showed up. And went to hear his heartbeat. And he resisted. Then he grabbed it and put it to his ear convinced that’s what she wanted. And was so good. Until she thanked him and moved it to his chest. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was when $h!t blew the f#*k up. The temper tantrum of his lifetime commenced. And did not stop the entire rest of the exam. Did not stop while the doctor updated his chart. Did not stop while I checked out and all the nurses looked at him as if he had sprouted not one, not two, but possibly seven heads. Not out the waiting room. Not down the elevator. Not outside where he proceeded to make a run for the super busy street. Not while I crossed the street holding him like a football because otherwise he kept throwing himself backwards throwing me off my balance. Not until I plunked him on a bench, far from any sort of street, and put him on time out to cool it.

Needless to say, I got home ragged. And defeated. And yet had to figure out how to go out with him again, this time with his sister, to the supermarket. It was mostly ok, with some tough bits (him biting his sister repeatedly being the best one). But I was completely off my rocker when I came home. When I undressed them and he decided the toilet was not suitable for his pee and instead turned and aimed his stream at his sister and all of the clothes on the floor I really had to fight hard with the inner mommy demon. I plunked him in the tub and temper tantrum ensued. I ignored it. Went to the kitchen, mixed sweet tea vodka with lemonade, and began methodically making quesadillas. Somewhere in this mentally checked out state, my dad showed up with MutantEldest from his Karate lesson. MutantEldest begged me to come to karate class on Thursday “please please please” and I obliged. My Dad had already disappeared into the bathroom to work his psychology skills on the tantrum monster. At some point I read the letter of invitation and discovered I had agreed to PARTICIPATE in Karate class. Tomorrow.

My Dad calmed the monster. Things went fine the rest of the night. Until three in the morning. When some dog started barking. And did. Not. Stop. It was 4 in the morning when I called the local police and reported the dog for incessant barking at a god forsaken hour on a weekday. Seriously. It was over an hour. With no stopping in sight. About fifteen minutes after I’d placed the call, I’m pretty sure I heard car doors and a few minutes after that? Silence. Golden. Pure. Silence.

October 13, 2010

WIP Wednesday

So I decided to jump on the bandwagon that is the Work in Progress Wednesday thing because I’m on this whole goal making and meeting thing and putting yourself out there is always a good motivation to not fail (fail = epic humiliation = not fun). I’ve begun crocheting Christmas gifts and those have a deadline so I’m determined to see this through to the finish. For one relative, I have begun a smooshy, soft throw using Vanna’s Choice yarn. This thing goes fast. It’s averaging me about 7 minutes a row after taking forever on that first row. I’m exactly a third of the way through this one.

The other thing on the hook is a set of leg warmers for someone who may or may not read this blog. Needless to say, they are so pretty-looking and the yarn is very soft. This pattern in particular is laced up with ribbon for a really pretty look and good fit. I’m excited about them. This pattern in particular has had a super meditative effect on me. Zonks me out completely.

The other WIP is the Monster Cape which I did take a picture of on my actual camera which is sitting in my actual house somewhere. I knew I shouldn’t have tried for anything fancy and just stuck with the phone. Oh well. Three more tentacles to go plus the hat. It. Will. Happen.

In other happenings, things are well. I like to try and make a note of that whenever I realize it because when things turn sour, I tend to just forget that for the most part life is pretty smooth and shiny. It’s true so why pretend otherwise? I work really hard to have a content life, I think I should take a moment and acknowledge that my hard work does indeed pay off for the most part. That’s one thing about this job: there are lots of tiny little fragile reminders of how lucky I am.

MutantEldest is following in his dear momma’s footsteps and turning into a complete and total bookworm. This is being completely encouraged by his daily homework assignment of reading for 15 minutes. He’s absolutely inhaling books. I was reading Phantom Tollbooth to him but it’s hard to do this often because he really likes reading his own things too. It’s just amazing seeing him grow. You know when you’re a kid and everyone’s always freaking out about “Oh my goodness you’re so big!”? And you’re like “Whatever freak”? I understand the freaks! I just looked at MutantEldest the other day and did a double-take. It was as if I was seeing him for the first time in ages. SO big– not just physically but all-around bigness.

Oh, I’m on Facebook! I do hope you’ll come and “like me” on there because that’d be nice. But I also understand if you don’t.

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